Mr. P'body's Place

Well I am leaving in a manner of minutes for the North Georgia Mountains. Gonna spend the weekend in a cabin. I totally didn't realize that it was Easter weekend. School and looking for an apartment for the summer is just taking up too much of my mind right now. Now, why the hell is Barry Manilow doing on this page....we if talking about the Oscars® wasn't gay enough for you.... I love Barry Manilow! I am not afraid to say it, the dude just fucking rocks my face off! It is probably one of the only artists that both myself and my dad can listen too. Scary thought I know! There is an upside....you aren't stuck here listening to me and my Manilow fetish. You check out all the other cool places on the web until I get back on Sunday with an update of some content. So until then, check out all these people's pages....they are cool (but not as cool as Barry Manilow unfortunately).

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Well, the Oscars® are over and done with for another year. I watched the 4 hour long spectacle and must say I was surprised by a lot of the awards. I participated in the Yahoo! Oscar® Pool and I must say I didn't do too bad. Although a few of the awards did take me for a loop. The first was Ian McKellen not winning for Best Supporting Actor. The other major surprise was Randy Newman actually winning an Oscar® after 16 tries. I totally didn't see that coming. But the whole reason people watch the Oscars® is to look at all the fine people in Hollywood strut their stuff on the red carpet in the newest fashion. A lot of shows create their own lists of best and worst dress. I would like to present pics of all those who I thought looked especially "hooterific" on Oscar® evening (a phrase which was coined by Adam Sandler in the movie Big Daddy).

"Hooterific"
[pic] [pic] - Uma Thurman was looking quite nice that evening. In fact, there were several moments in the show where I thought the camera angles were deliberately toward the best view of her breasts. Unfortunately she guarded constantly by her husband Ethan Hawke, but I don't blame the guy. I would do the same.
[pic] - Jennifer Lopez was looking hot as usual, but what the hell was she there for anyway? Go back to doing porn!
[pic] [pic] [pic] - Halle Berry was the big star of the night, and that dress also helped her. Damn! She was looking so hot, I was craving some sexual chocolate by the evening's end.

"Anti-Hooterific"
[pic] [pic] - Cameron Diaz normally dresses with supermodel style, but apparently she her fashion sense too a lunch break when she picked out that dress.
[pic] - Faith Hill, the Country music sex goddess, was smoking some crack when she picked out that psychedelic dress.
[pic] - Whoopi, the name explains the dress.
[pic] - Reese Witherspoon is still cursed with the 50s style hair cut and the Jay Leno chin.
[pic] - What in the hell?!?!
[pic] [pic] - Gwyneth Paltrow won the best dress Goth of the evening. Maybe she hoping the dark lord would grant here a golden man.
[pic] - Nicole Kidman needs to get some sun. She was the same color as here freaking ugly pinkish dress. Go back to doing porn!

Despite all the crappy outfits people were wearing, the awards had an overbearing Black celebration feel. It was a major step for the Academy Awards to recognize a few of the Black Actors and Actresses. But at a point it began to feel staged to me. I think I just increased my gaiety score by talking about all the Oscars® and what people were wearing. Oh well...All in all, the night was filled with lots of gaiety.

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So right now I am in the middle of watching the Oscars on TV, having some Thin Mints and a Capri-Sun. Ever noticed how Thin Mints taste just like Hot Chocolate with some Peppermint Schnapps. I am sure some of you have wondered why i don't have more pictures of myself on here. Well that is because I don't have many. I know it is kinda sad. Most of the pictures I have are of things I have taken. Rarely does the photographer get to photograph himself. So here the few pics I have of myself (granted that these are pretty old).

Okay, so that last one was probably kinda tacky. Hell, what am I kidding...all of them were tacky. Some of them I took all by myself. Can you tell I am one of the those people who does think they photograph well? Come back tomorrow, maybe I will have something worth reading.

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As you can probably see to the left, I got a new poll from Bravenet and I am not totally sure that I like it. I could just make my own poll using some script, but this is just way easier. So let me know if you like it. Just to let you know in advance....the images for this post really has nothing to do at all with this post. But of course by me acknowledging the image in the post in fact makes it have something to do with the post. Jeff wanted me to give his site I am a punk a plug, but as you might notice...it is not even up yet. Not that that even matters. Ajay has been back from a trip to India....has some really interesting pictures. I think he really went through Britney Spears and porn withdrawal over there. I don't even know how Retunh finds all those pictures of people sticking stuff up their butt. That is just wrong! Maybe some one needs a new hobbie. Although I do think that everyone who is a webmaster has a hobbie of looking at porn. Silly people looking at porn.

Ask Jeeve's really stupid questions and see what comes up...
Where can I score some weed?
Are you left-handed?
How is it hanging?
Do you like boobies?
Do you get asked a lot of stupid questions?

Let's Ponder...
If quitters never win, and winners never quit, what fool came up with, "Quit while you're ahead"?
I was thinking that women should put pictures of missing husbands on beer cans.
I thought about how mothers feed their babies with little tiny spoons and forks so I wonder what Chinese mothers use. Perhaps toothpicks?
Employment application blanks always ask who is to be notified in case of an emergency. I think you should write. A Good Doctor.
Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to?
How do I set my laser printer on stun? (thanks BHZ for the link)
How is it possible to have a civil war?
If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?
If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
If you ate pasta and antipasto, would you still be hungry?
If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
Why are hemorrhoids called "hemorrhoids" instead of "asteroids"?
Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them?
Why is the alphabet in that order? Is it because of that song?
Where are we going? And what's with this handbasket?
If the black box flight recorder is never damaged during a plane crash, why isn't the whole airplane made out of the stuff?
Why is there an expiration date on sour cream?
If most car accidents occur within five miles of home, why doesn't everyone just move 10 miles away?
Whose cruel idea was it for the word "lisp" to have an "s" in it?
Since light travels faster than sound, isn't that why some people appear bright until you hear them speak?
If it's zero degrees outside today, and it's supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be?
Why do you press harder on a remote control when you know the battery is dead?
Why do banks charge you a "non sufficient funds fee" on money they already know you don't have?
Does the reverse side also have a reverse side?
If the universe is everything, and scientists say that the universe is expanding, what is it expanding into?
If a tree falls in the forest, and no one is around to see it, do the other trees make fun of it?

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IDIOTS IN SERVICE

This week, all our office phones went dead and I had to contact the telephone repair people. They promised to be out between 8:00 a.m. and 7:00p.m. When I asked if they could give me a smaller time window, the pleasant gentleman asked, "Would you like us to call you before we come?" I replied that I didn't see how he would be able to do that, since our phones weren't working. He also requested that we report future outages by email (Does YOUR email work without a telephone line?).

IDIOTS AT WORK

I was signing the receipt for my credit card purchase when the clerk noticed I had never signed my name on the back of the credit card. She informed me that she could not complete the transaction unless the card was signed. When I asked why, she explained that it was necessary to compare the signature I had just signed on the receipt. So I signed the credi! t card in front of her. She carefully compared the signature to the one I had just signed on the receipt. As luck would have it, they matched.

IDIOTS IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD

I live in a semi-rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the local township administrative office to request the removal of the Deer Crossing sign on our road. The reason: too many deer were being hit by cars and he didn't want them to cross there anymore.

IDIOTS IN FOOD SERVICE

My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco. She asked the person behind the counter for "minimal lettuce." He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg.

IDIOT SIGHTING #1:

I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked, "Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?" To which I replied, "If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?" He smiled knowingly and nodded, "That's why we ask.

IDIOT SIGHTING #2

At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker who was leaving the company due to "downsizing," our manager commented cheerfully, "This is fun. We should do this more often." Not a word was spoken. We all just looked at each other.....

IDIOT SIGHTING #3

I work with an individual who plugged her power strip back into itself and for the life of her couldn't understand why her system would not turn on.

IDIOT SIGHTING #4

When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver's side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. "Hey," I announced to the technician, "It's open!" To which he replied, "I know - I already got that side."

NOW DON'T YOU FEEL BETTER

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What did I do today....same as yesterday. I think I am in a rut. I am pissed at Ballot-Box.net because they are not reliable at all. They just randomly close down every once in a while, come back with "more features" to get people to come back, and then just disappear again. I need to find a new quiz client. Or maybe if I actually knew how to code, I could come up with one on my own. How many kittens have you killed today? Today was just a weird day...and I had a feeling it would be when I woke up. There was a 120 car accident on I-75. To even look at the photos of the accident was kinda disturbing. In other news, Miss "Call me now for yer free tarot readin" Cleo turns out to be not from Jamaica at all, but rather California. Okay...this is a little off the wall, but my friend is looking for man, maybe someone can help her out. She is gonna hit me for this. Why don't you just then design your own face or maybe if you are really bored you can play some test-based pong. So last night, FOX network reached a new low with their intelligent programming of Celebrity Boxing. From what I have heard, I was glad to have missed the performance. These out of work "celebrities" even subjected themselves to cheap advertisement by adorning their bodies with ads for GoldenPalance.com. Of course I must say this was a step up from their other major smash hit of The Glutton Bowl where competitive eating reigns supreme. That had to be the most disgusting thing I ever saw on TV. FOX needs to just stick to their current line-up of the That 60's, 70's, 80's and 90's shows. Can't go wrong by poking fun at decade fades.

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Raining day procrastination at its best. That is right....I have done jack squat today, I really don't feel like doing much else. As you can see, Jack Daniel's finally put up the picture of when Hakeber and I went to the distillery. I found out that they have one hell of a legal linking policy and I am sure I am in violation of it. Hell, I am probably in violation but just putting up that last link. Here is the ticket for the tour. That is probably another violation of some legal policy. So I took a lot of online quizzes today. I am 48% addicted to Instant Messenger. How about you? I know it is a sad thing, but I am sure there are much more people out there who are worse than I am. I have taken a lot of quizzes at the Spark and have found out a lot about myself. I have an IQ of 127. Did you know that I am 51% pure? But even more surprising is that I am 48% a bastard! I am also 40% lazy and 39% gay. Okay that last one kinda shocked me, I don't think I will be taking anymore test right now.

On with the news...
AOL passes 34 million mark - Just great, the and and service in the world is again making leaps and bounds in number. I am sure at least 5 million are dead accounts.
Controversial body show defended - I see dead people. Well you know I had to say it...
Team picks white man mascot to make point - I guess there opponents can all chant, "Kill Whitey" and it won't be totally a racial slur. Now you can see how I got 48% on my bastard test.

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So I did go up to Tennessee last Wednesday. Lynchburg, Tennessee in fact. To the (in)famous Jack Daniel's Distillery. Let me just say that I had a blast up there. Our tour guide, Goose, was just so funny. I would definitely do it again. Maybe next time Hunter can come to since he lives close to there. After getting back from there, I went straight to a convention over the weekend. It was a blast to say the least but it took up all of my time. So I missed a lot of things happening. First of all, Notsoclear.org was added to the list of those in the Dirty South! Even though I have only been gone for a little while, a lot has happened in the world. People are now using Pringles cans to hack wireless networks. Of course I would be suspicious of anyone who is pointing a Pringles can at me in the first place. Find out which Drew Barrymore you are, I am "Charle's Angels Drew". In my spare time, I also enjoy collecting used socks from teenaged girls everywhere that I go. And finally the one of the longest debates of all time has been brought up again: Ginger vs. Maryann.

Plugz...
The AV Club - Prank calls + pranks videos = crazy stuff!
Geeks are cool - I have been trying to convience my girlfriend that is a true statement
Green Mamba - There is absolutely not dancing involved
The Gray Scale - Represent the ATL!

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That Kylie Monigue is fairly hot. Even though her newest one-hit-wonder song "Get You Out of Head" is driving me insane, she is definitely some good eye candy. Seriously though, I hate that style of electronica, it makes the worst impression for those people whom have never actually heard what good techno is suppose to sound like. But besides all that, Kylie does make for some "schwing" type action. I mean just look at how hot this 5'1" frame can be! So last night I got drunk off of my ass with my girlfriend and her roommate, and we had a grand ole time. I talked to Hunter last night and I think I think I confused him a couple times with my endless ramblings. I showed him the link to this thing and I am sure he just didn't know what to make of it. I was really buzzing at the time. In any event, we both came to conclusion that Jocelyn from Unlovely.net is pretty damn hot. I wonder if she is gonna show off her boobs as much as Cookie use to (come back to us Cookie)!

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Well it was a short trip to the ACC Women's Basketball Tourney. We lost in the very last second of the game on a lay-up. Not the best way to lose a game. On the lighter side, all the women were really appreciative that we (the band) came and supported them that we all got hugs. It is one of the strangest feelings in the world to be hugged by a girl who is your same height. In any event, I am back in town and ready to enjoy the rest of my Spring Break. So today I celebrated my new found freedom by going to the outlets and shopping my ass off. So after a nice $300 spent in a manner of hours, I now have been transformed into a new me. I just went crazy in Banana Republic and got a couple shirts, a new sweater, and finally some nice black pants. I also got some new shoes to go with all my new clothes, and of course by going to the outlets, I saved a bundle. After a long day of shopping, I am gonna go and get my drink on....more tomorrow.

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So I watch Survivor 4 last night. All I gonna say is boobs, boobs, boobs, and more boobs. That Sarah Jones is one sexy beast!. I think I am gonna keep watching, well at least until she is voted off. Definitely some eye candy right there. Well this is gonna be a small update since I have to leave in a manner of minutes. I am off to not so sunny Greensboro, NC for the ACC Women's Basketball Tourney. Let me tell you, the only reason I am going is the fact that I am getting paid to go. Well that is not the total truth cause my girlfriend is also going on the trip. She just recently updated website and it hella cool. You can tell that she much more artistic than I am. Of course while I am away, I won't be able to keep track of my weight, but I will still be taking the Stacker 2 while I am gone. While I am gone, try to check out the other stuff on this site. Also, try and hit up Retnuh, BigDarkCloud, and Deviant cause they are just cool people. I am outta here....peace!

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